What it means to lead - Simon Sinek

Colonel Ducek said that she was entering the 21st century by reading her remarks from the iPad, I'm stepping back into the 18th century, I have my remarks written on the back of an envelope for the awardees today this is for you and so what I thought I would do is share a couple of stories about what it means to lead some pointers as you begin the next journey of your life the next part of the journey of your life this is by no means a complete list but a few ideas one of the things that you will have to do as you grow up is to understand how and when to seize an opportunity.

I went for a run with a friend of mine around Central Park and every week or so there's an organization that organizes races in Central Park so we were doing one of these formal races and very often they have a sponsor and they'll give something away for free at the end apples or something on this particular day they were giving away free bagels and we past the finish line and there was a you know a few cafeteria tables laid up next to each other and on one side of the cafeteria tables were volunteers handing out bagels there were boxes of bagels on the tables and then a long line of runners waiting to be given their free bagel.

So, I said to my friend let's get a few bagel and he says nah man I don't want to stand in a line and I said free bagels he's like nah I don't want to stand in the line I was like free bagels and that's when I realized there was two kinds of people in this world there are people who see the thing they want and there are people who see the thing that's preventing them from getting the thing they want and so I went up to the line I leaned in between the line I put my hands in between a couple of people I grabbed a couple of bagels and I got us free bagels and this is the point which is you're allowed to take shortcuts and you're allowed to go out of the thing you want what you're not allowed to do is push someone out of the way and deny them getting the thing that they want.

No one got mad at me because I didn't cut the line I didn't push myself into the line I simply leaned it what I sacrifice was choice I didn't get to choose what I wanted and this is the point stay fixated on the thing you want go after the thing you want use any means necessary to get the thing you want but do not deny anybody else from getting the thing that they want lesson to tell the truth it's the most important thing you can ever do I visited Quantico Marine base in Quantico Virginia and the day I was there total coincidence there had been an incident and so we sat down for a meeting with the colonel the boss of Quantico he was going to give us a briefing on what goes on at Quantico and he showed up a few minutes late you know.

It's a big deal with marine stroke a few mins late and he apologized he said I'm terribly sorry Oh from dealing with this incident we're considering throwing one of our Marines out of OCS in other words throwing them out of the Marine Corps and I thought this must be serious I mean to get thrown out of the Marine Corps so I said what did he do thinking he broke you know what crime did he commit and the colonel said he fell asleep on watch and I said that's it he fell asleep on watch in the woods of Virginia and you're going to throw him out for that you guys are tough he says no you don't understand when we asked him about it he denied it when we asked him about it again he denied again and only when we gave him irrefutable proof did he say quote, I want to take responsibility for my actions.

The problem we have is you take responsibility for your actions at the time you perform your actions not at the time you get caught he said we had another marine that fell asleep he admitted it he got punished we have no problem with him the colonel went on to explain to me that he cannot put this would-be leader in a position of responsibility for the lives of other human beings if their downrange and for one minute if his men doubt that the words coming out of their leaders mouth or anything but the truth if they think that he's saying anything to cover his own hide or to make himself look better Trust will disintegrate when people will die the amazing thing is we don't have to be in positions of life or death for people to earn our trust for people to want to follow us and believe that we have their interests in mind and not our own.

The single greatest thing you can learn to do to earn the trust of those around you is to tell the truth good or bad whether it puts you in a good light or a bad light telling the truth is really easy or being honest is really easy it's just about telling the truth and so I have a little challenge for you for the next 48 hours just to prove how difficult it is so what's the time now it's about quarter past twelve was it Friday today right so till quarter past twelve on Sunday you may not tell a single lie it's really hard because we're conditioned to tell lies it's not always a bad thing somebody gives you a birthday present and you think it's the ugliest thing you've ever seen and they say to you do you like it do you say no or do you say thank you I love it which is a lie so you have to find other wait nice ways of saying things if somebody says do I look fat in these jeans you don't say yes you say I like the other ones on you better.

The point is for the next 48 hours try not telling a lie number three ask for and accept help the biggest mistake people make is thinking that they have to know all the answers or thinking if they don't that they have to pretend they do one of the biggest failures of most leaders is the belief that their leadership credibility comes from their intelligence it doesn't there was a retired captain from the Navy captain David mark hay who was a career naval officer Submariner who's given the one of the greatest honors any naval officer could ask for his given command of his own submarine los angeles-class nuclear-powered fast attack sub how cool is that he was been going to be given command of the USS Olympia and it was one of the best rated crews in the whole fleet and mark hey like many believe that his credibility as a leader would be based on his own intelligence and so he studied that boat for a year.

He spent a year on board learning every screw every nut every bolt every valve he studied the dossiers of his crew he knew everything about who they were where they come from with their education where he was going to be a good captain two weeks before he took him out of the Olympia he got a phone call that told him you won't be the captain with the Olympia you will be the captain at the Santa Fe and by the way it's the worst rated crew in the entire United States submarine fleet they ranked last or close to last in almost every readiness measurement the Navy had mark K didn't want to let anybody know that he was a little bit unfamiliar with the slightly newer ship so he kept it to himself and he also he's still an ambitious guy with a big ego and he figured if I give good orders I'll have a good ship and if I give great orders I will have and so in the first day started barking orders to set sail and everything was going smoothly everybody was following orders.

It was great second or third day out submerged they decided to run an exercise they turned off the nuclear reactor manually and pretended they had a meltdown and they ran on battery power it's called EPM and mark' decided to make a little harder see how his crew would respond them to pressure so he gave a simple order ahead two-thirds which means run the boat 2/3 its maximum speed his number two in command standing right next to him who incidentally had more experience on the boat than anybody else two and a half years aboard the Santa Fe repeated at the command I had two thirds and nothing happened mark a piers Abbott from the side of his periscope and he sees seaman Jones a couple stripes on his arm just sitting there squirming in a seat mark he could see it our cases seaman Jones what's the problem and seaman Jones replies sir there is no two-thirds setting apparently on this slightly newer boat there was just no 2/3 setting on the battery power so he turns to his number two he said did you know this he said mmm-hmm.

He said then why did you give the order he said because you told me to and it's at that point mark hay realizes that he's aboard a ship that he doesn't understand and he has a crew trained for compliance it's not like he can just turn around and come back and change his crew or get another boat this is his crew and so he was forced to Rhianna stand what leadership means leadership is not the captain knowing all the answers leadership is trusting that his people knew more than he did because the person who did know was seaman Jones with two stripes on his arm who knew exactly how the ship worked the people at the top have all the authority but the people at the bottom have all the information the goal is not push the information up the goal is to put push the authority down trust people that they know how to do their jobs and when they offer you help say yes admit you don't know things because when you admit you don't know things people will help when you say you know everything it's not that people don't want to help they just don't think you need it.

Ask for and accept help take the risk to trust people that's the next next lesson Bob Chapman who's a dear friend of mine runs a large manufacturing company in st. Louis called barry-wehmiller historically in factories in this country we treat management differently than we treat the people who work in a factory floor for example if you work in management and you need supplies you go to the supply cabinet you open it up you take out pens and papers or whatever you need if you work on the factory floor you ask permission for to go to the supply cage that's kept under lock and key so that someone else can sign out stuff that you may need if you work in management.

If you're going to be home late for work from work you pick up the phone you call your kids you tell them you going to be on light if you work in a factory floor you ask permission to go to the pay phone to call your kids to tell them you're going to be home late and it creates this division we think that because someone doesn't have a college education that they're untrustworthy nonsense and so Bob took the risk of trust without any fanfare without running any studies without asking for anything in return he simply ordered that all the locks be removed from all the cages and that people could sign out their own equipment if they wanted it he took the risk of trust he got rid of all the pay phones and put in company phones that anybody could use at any time he got rid of all of the whistles that indicate when somebody should start work when they should take a break and when they should stop work he figured if in management they know when to start their jobs on a factory floor people know when to start their jobs we don't need to blow whistles he took the risk of trust asking for nothing in return morale went up theft went down because when we trust people they rise to the occasion and when we don't trust people they rise to the occasion leadership means taking the risk of trust even if it goes the wrong way because you'll be responsible for when something doesn't go right.

This is one of the fun things about leadership when everything goes right you give the credit away and when everything goes wrong you take all the responsibility that's what it means to lead this is my favorite story of all remember who you are there was an Undersecretary of Defense who's giving a speech at a large conference like a thousand people and he he was he'd recently retired she was a former Undersecretary of Defense and he was standing on the stage giving his speech his prepared remarks and he while he was talking he was taking a sip out of a cup of coffee he had in this Styrofoam cup and he sort of looks down and smiles and interrupts his prepared remarks.

He says you know last year I was the secretary as the undersecretary and I spoke at this exact same event in this exact same venue last year except last year while I was still under secretary they flew me here business class they had a car waiting for me to take me from the airport to the hotel someone had already checked me in and escorted me up to my room the next morning I came downstairs there was someone waiting for me in the lobby and they took me to this same venue they took me in the back entrance they took me into the greenroom and they handed me a cup of coffee in a beautiful ceramic cup he says I'm no longer the undersecretary I flew here coach I took a taxi from the hotel to the airport I checked myself in this morning I took another taxi to the same venue I walked in the front door I found my way to the backstage and when I asked somebody do you have any coffee he pointed to the coffee machine in the corner and I poured myself a cup of coffee into this here Styrofoam cup he says the lesson is the ceramic cup was never meant for me it was meant for the position I hold.

I deserve a Styrofoam cup we all deserve styrofoam cups as you become more successful as you do well in life you will be afforded many advantages people will call you sir and ma'am they'll carry your luggage they'll hold doors open for you they will bring you a cup of tea without you even asking for it but it's not meant for you it's meant for the position you hold and when you move on they will give all those things to the person who replaces you never ever forget that you only ever deserved a Styrofoam cup go forth and do well thank you very very much.